You ever wonder if you're a burden? Like you need the people that you care about more than they actually need you? That you're not giving enough into your relationships? It's a hard place to be. How do you resolve it? Will they tell you the truth if you ask? Will they be offended or relieved if you start pulling away or finding other friendships that you might be able to contribute more to? And is that even possible?
It's not something you can easily quantify. The thing I'm starting to realize is that people come to relationships for different reasons, so they may be expecting different things. Whether this makes maintaining relationships easier or harder is a matter of opinion and probably varies from relationship to relationship.
The important thing, I guess, is to try not to be selfish. Trying to make sure that you're not dead weight, and that you're making an effort to invest in their lives.
I know the last few posts have been pretty disjointed, but for now I'm just using this to work through some things. The less I keep in my head, the less stress I have to worry about. Hopefully, this will keep the depressed spirals at bay, and reduce the amount of tension going on in my life. I've had enough interpersonal tension lately, and I'd like a little time to recover.
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